Back when the ponies ran, when the girls were young and the odds were there to beat, my little personal winning streak ended as it had begun, naturally, without my being aware of it.
Why not someone else who deserved it?
My winning streak ended like a black-feathered bird bursting the sky had landed on me.
With no odds to beat left, the only thing I clearly see is my journey on a downward spiral.
It feels like in the dead of night. I’m at the steering wheel of a speeding car crashing down a steep ravine. Trees out of nowhere in the car’s headlights. With nothing left but a single wish, the wish to survive even if it costs me my life
After the crashing down comes to a halt, there’s nothing left but me and a gate Bob Dylan built.
I’m on the outside of the gate.
On the inside is a devil my neighbors, preachers, and teachers want me to believe.
There’s nothing else and nobody else near, so I can tell what I’m supposed to believe is looking at me.
What does it want?
I have no clue.
Perhaps a piece of me?
Could it be my heart?
You think I’m kidding, aren’t you?
Well, I’m not kidding at all.
Instead, I do a u-turn never to re-turn again.
I’ve once seen a torero perform u-turns before a bull.
When the bull was dead I vomited wishing the torero were dead instead.
Such a u-turn I do now
I’m walking down the highway into a town ravaged by a thausand-years war.
I enter a burned-out house that looks familiar.
At the end of a blackened corridor, a burned-out room.
A boy looks out of a shattered glass window.
His back is turned to me.
Suitcase on the floor.
Guided by ignorance, I walk up to him and hold his hand in mine.
He’s looking at me with wishful eyes.
I can clearly see his eyes are mine.
We’re one and the same.
Together we step into street flooded in lightyears of energy from the sun above
I can clearly see things from different perspectives now.
See the wishful, see what is.
If there’s a difference between religion and the bird, believe the bird.
For birds don’t have religion/s.
They wouldn’t know it if you showed it to them
Celebrated here twice daily.
Giving thanks twice daily for the wishful and giving thanks for what is.
Giving thanks twice daily for the boy with the eyes and giving thanks for being here.